My Friend “Addiction”
As I struggled in my efforts to actualize everyone's expectations, I wasn't aware of the deep pit that was opening up inside me. It was a pit of loneliness that just got deeper as time went on. My subconscious dealt with this by creating a wall of sorts, deep inside my heart. At first, this wall was just between me and myself, but as time went on, it became a wall between me and the rest of the world. I closed up inside myself, and slowly began to withdraw from life and from the world around me.
And then on one clear day, a new friend entered my life: "Addiction". The loneliness, which had been my lot in life for so long, suddenly disappeared like it never was. "Addiction" made me feel more wanted and desired than ever before. I felt that I had finally found my true friend, a friend in times of need. Whenever things were hard or I felt down or lonely, "Addiction" would appear to be there for me, as if to encourage me and give me a false sense of belonging and acceptance.
And so, as the years progressed, "Addiction" accompanied me wherever I went. While everyone else had such high expectations of me and made demands accordingly, my dear friend "Addiction" had no demands of me at all. All that "Addiction" wanted was that I feel good and be comfortable, and forget the cruel world around me. In "Addiction", I always found a listening ear, offering comfort and solace.
All was good and well, until one day I discovered that this dedicated "friend" was actually the very thing that was not letting me make progress in life and achieve my goals. I asked "Addiction" to give me some space and let me be a little bit, but "Addiction" was not willing to accept this under any circumstances. And suddenly he changed his appearance. From a good friend in times of need, "Addiction" became an unrelenting and cruel oppressor that dwelled deep within me and used my weaknesses against me - weaknesses that he knew better than anyone, often better than myself.