(An excerpt from a Big Book reading)
Acceptance is the key. The addiction is a disease and sobriety is not a matter of willpower. When we stop living in the problem, and instead live in the answer, the problem goes away by itself.
And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation- some fact of my life -unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism (read: addiction), I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.
We think that if we could just control the external environment, our internal environment would become more comfortable. But it doesn't. When we turn our will and lives over to the care of G-d, we are taking care of the internal environment, and then we find that the external environment takes care of itself.
For years I was sure the worst thing that could happen to a nice guy like me would be that I would turn out to be an alcoholic (read: addict). Today I find that it's the best thing that has ever happened to me. This proves I don't know what's good for me. And if I don't know what's good for me, then I don't know what's good or bad for you or for anyone. So I'm better off if I don't give advice, don't figure I know what's best, and just accept life on life's terms, as it is today - especially my own life, as it actually is.
It's as though A.A. had given me a new pair of glasses.